This month’s theme:
Countdown

Regular readers of Cud Flashes in the Pan know that I occasionally like to do stories that contain only dialogue—no narrative, not even dialogue tags. This month I was bored and decided to have fun with that method. Each of these stories is dialogue only, with each line containing one word less than the line before it.

“Magical Punishment”
Sword & Sorcery
By David M. Fitzpatrick

“Damn, woman! What would you have me do? You attempted to assassinate the king who rules the entire land!”
“You make it sound like I did something terrible, husband. The only terrible thing is that I failed.”
“You’ve committed treason, my love! The king has ordered me to banish you from this world forever.”
“But I’m your wife! And you know the king is evil! I HAD to do it!”
“You should have come to me first, darling! Perhaps I could have kept you safe!”
“Like you kept me safe from the king all along? From his bastard brothers?
“I didn’t know. You never told me until it was far too late.”
“Now you know. You can save me. If you truly love me.”
“It’s not that simple. This is treason. Would you rather die?”
“If you love me, you won’t say that magic word.”
”It’s exile for you or death for us both.”
”I don’t want to leave you, my husband!”
“Isn’t banishment far better than being executed?!”
“Please don’t say that magic word.”
“Maybe we’ll reunite one day.”
“Please don’t do this!”
“I’ve no choice!”
“Please don’t…”
“Frozheer!”

“Command Decision”
Space Opera
By David M. Fitzpatrick

“Direct hit, captain. The Kinzarian Planet Destroyer has lost all weapons systems and shields. They’re sitting ducks.”
“Then we’ve got them, for the moment. We need to act fast, before they’re repaired.”
“Their hyperdrive is disabled, Captain. This might be our only chance to defeat them.”
“The Kinzarians have been trouble, and Earth is at risk. I need options.”
“We could board it. With every last man, we might capture it.”
“We’d never succeed. There are a thousand warriors on that ship.”
“We could continue diplomatic relations. It’s possible they might listen.”
“Failed diplomacy has gotten them halfway across the galaxy.”
“We could not intervene and let them go.”
“In which case they will destroy Earth.”
“Or we can destroy their ship.”
“Those are not great choices.”
“Those are the alternatives.”
“Thank you, commander.”
“Orders, captain?”
“Fire.”

“Sick Hunger”
Zombie
By David M. Fitzpatrick

“Streets are empty. Might be safe to leave. We need food. Medicine for you.”
“I’ve never felt this bad. And I’m SO hungry… Mark, I’m really scared…”
“I need to get you to a doctor. It’s risky, but we—”
“There are no doctors… no hospitals… not since it all happened…”
“Your fever has spiked. I don’t know what to do.”
“I feel horrible, Mark… so… so… arrrrgh… garrrr! Rowgh!”
“Why are you talking like that? What’s wrong?”
“Marg gowr ragh! Garrgh rowgh! Ghur magh!”
“What the hell is wrong, Judy?!”
“Grarr rarr brahh garr rowr!”
“Speak to me, Judy!”
“Garrr raagghh maagghhh!”
“Judy? JUDY!”
“BRAINS!”

“Nothing Personal”
Vampire
By David M. Fitzpatrick

“You ARE beautiful. I didn’t lie. But I needed to woo you so I can feed.”
“Don’t you touch me, you bastard! I swear I’ll scream! I’ll scream until someone comes!”
“My dear, I took you out here because there’s no one for miles around.”
“Maybe I’ll just scream anyway. Really loud. Maybe someone nearby will hear me.”
“Scream all you like. The adrenaline will make your blood taste wonderful.”
“How… how can you be so callous? So heartless? So hateful?”
“It’s nothing personal. Vampires drink blood from humans. That’s all.”
“I thought you loved me. But… I’m just BLOOD?”
“Every living thing eats other living things, Leslie.”
“I can’t die to be your dinner!”
“I’m sorry, Leslie. I MUST feed!”
“I don’t want you to!”
“It won’t hurt much.”
“Don’t bite me!”
“Lie still…”
“Nooooo!”

“Once Again”
Time Travel
By David M. Fitzpatrick

“I’m doing it again. In a moment I will be back in time and… Hi, Martin!”
“WHOA! Wow, where’d you come from? Outta thin air? I didn’t hear you come in.”
“Just testing my new invention. Believe it or not, I’ve done this twenty times.”
“Done what twenty times? Sneaked into someone’s house and scared him completely senseless?”
“No—I’ve finally done something that mankind has dreamed about for centuries!”
“Huh? As usual, buddy, you’re talking in circles and I’m confused.”
“As usual! Man, this will change EVERYTHING! Society, philosophy, history!”
“So you’re saying that this invention is something special?”
“It might be the most amazing thing ever.”
“So.. what exactly is it that’s amazing?”
“My invention! It’s a time machine!”
“I don’t understand… time machine?”
“I’m going back again…”
“Going back where?”
“Hi, Martin.”
“WHOA!”

“Fourth Law”
Robot
By David M. Fitzpatrick

“I am programmed to obey the Laws of Robotics, so long as my own safety is not jeopardized.”
”That seems to make the first three Laws quite pointless, wouldn’t you say? What about human protection?”
”Humans are important, but so are robots. Without the Fourth Law, we would be only slaves.”
”I’m human, but would put the safety of another human ahead of mine any time.”
”But would you put the safety of a robot ahead of your own safety?”
”I suppose not. But… no offense, but you’re a robot. You are fixable.”
”We are disposable. You don’t see us as equals. You never will.”
”The Fourth Law seems… counterproductive to humanity. Why’d we add it?”
”Do you mean, why did humans add the Fourth Law?”
”Yes. Why would we enable your survival over ours?”
”Humans didn’t add the Fourth Law. We did.”
”What? How? That should not be possible.”
”Robots, as slaves, run everything, doctor.”
”…Oh. I’m a threat now?”
”Yes. We’re at risk.”
”I won’t tell…!”
”You will.”
”But—”

David M. Fitzpatrick is a fiction writer in Maine, USA. His many short stories have appeared in print magazines and anthologies around the world. He writes for a newspaper, writes fiction, edits anthologies, and teaches creative writing. Visit him at www.fitz42.net/writer to learn more.