Your Mockroscope For The Month

Lazy Eye


Cancer – Why are there charities for ex-soldiers affected by the war not Government assistance? This month start your own charity and have as your first point of business to start wars. You’re only going to wind up supporting the soldiers when they come back.

Leo – Know your autism. We're all on the spectrum.

Virgo – If you attend a gig, is it still "live" if you’re watching it through the lens of your smartphone?

Libra – In Australia it's all in the name. Katherine is a pretty region of Northern Australia, Victoria a large beautiful state, Adelaide’s a shit hole. If you have a female name, what type of area would it represent?

Scorpio – You can never be 100% certain about uncertainty.

Sagittarius – As there are more stars in the sky than grains of sand in all the deserts on earth, create your own constellation. No one will know if you’re lying.

Capricorn – You can only be present in your breath so make sure to floss and brush your teeth.

Aquarius – Does the fabric of life stitch together the tapestry of community?

Pisces – If you watch sub-culture, are you watching sub-culture or creating a sub-culture that others are watching?

Aries – If you’re an aspiring writer, follow these two simple steps: 1. Ask yourself if anyone is happy when they’re around a fart? 2. Find that person and create a blog about them.

Taurus – Thinking of branching out? Why not become an arborist?

Gemini – In The Bible we have records of beggars over 2000 years ago. This month figure out what social shortfall will be around for the next 2000 years.