Postcard from Norway:
Forget Club Med, try Club Seal
Hamish Esplin

Fancy a holiday with a difference? Sick of traveling to well'worn destinations only to be confronted by a horde of camera'wielding tourists and a 21'year'old hotel receptionist named Darrell who can't find your reservation, or a shower, for that matter?

Well, Norway has the ideal escape for you to release your life's frustrations ' seal hunting.

Ahem! Did you just say 'seal hunting'? Indeed, and by that phrase I don't mean stalking the guy who sang the delightful song for a Batman movie a few years back, although that could be fun. I mean the grab'a'rifle'shoot'a'mammal'win'a'soft'toy kind of seal hunting.

As of January 2005 Norway will introduce seal hunting to their already burgeoning tourism industry in a move that perfectly fuses money'making with conservation. Each year Norway conducts a seal cull in a bid to ensure the population doesn't get out of hand. The dastardly little buggers are accused of, amongst other things, eating too much fish, damaging fish farms and spreading a roundworm that renders fish stocks inedible.

(If the words 'seal' and 'clubbing' have already sprung to mind then don't fear as you are not allowed to actually club seals to death any more. Nowadays, a simple bullet is far more effective.)

The current seal quota stands at around 2000, meaning that each hunting season enough mammalian actors to fill 500 Sea Worlds are disposed of. However, the actual number of kills falls below that level. Hence, the introduction of Norway's newest tourist attraction.

So, with recently relaxed national laws governing seal hunting, tourists willing to pay around $250 will get a day out in the wilderness and your own personal choice of seal to kill. Those with a more bloody temper can fork out more than $1600 for a four'day jaunt.

...This could be a big hit,... Norwegian Minister of Fisheries and Coastal Affairs Svein Ludvigsen said last month presumably following his remark with a curt ...No pun intended....

...The idea is not to step up seal hunting, or render the species extinct. All we're doing is allowing foreigners to take part.

...The seals are a real threat to the fishing industry....

And fishing is big business in the small Scandinavian country. It is their second largest export after oil, with an estimated annual value of between $5.5'6.5 billion.

Understandably, the conservation and tourism industry were a little appalled at the plan despite Norway currently being the only country to conduct commercial whaling.

...It is ridiculous to import foreign help to do something that Norwegian fishers themselves don't bother doing,... fired Rasmus Hansson, head of the World Wildlife Fund's Norwegian section.

...There have always been seals along the Norwegian coast. They are part of nature. We can't just go around killing whatever it is we don't like about nature....

However, the issue is a bit murkier than it appears at first'hand with the reasoning behind the move centering on bringing seal hunting into line with the various other forms of hunting. Each year foreigners apply for licenses to shoot game such as deer and moose, but first they must pass a series of strict tests including marksmanship. Reports that a successful hit on a seal is rewarded with a series of tokens redeemable for soft, cuddly toys at the gift shop have yet to be confirmed.

Images courtesy of Geek Philosopher

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